Kids, Mom Life, parenting, Parenting is hard

The Hardest Goodbyes

LifeUnEdited Week #6

I promised I would give you life UnEdited each week, so here it is me getting real with you with my adventures of Parenting and Marriage! If you are just joining us, click here to find out just why we are giving you Life UnEdited!

The Hardest Goodbyes

I feel a physical pang in my stomach that is indescribable. It happens 4 times a year; when I watch two of my greatest joys walk down the long runway to get on the plane to go see their dad. I feel the tears stream silently down my face. I hear the sobs of Talie wanting to chase after her older brothers. I hug her and tell her that they will be back soon, but she doesn’t understand, she is only two. I push TJ in the stroller as I carry a sobbing little girl who just wants her brothers. We miss them already. We walk to the car hugging each other, we get in and start the silent drive home without a piece of us.


The boys’ dad and I have figured out how to co-parent pretty well, always putting the boys’ needs and desires before our own, but it still does not make the sadness go away when they are gone.

You tend to start to miss the endless amounts of laundry they make, their shoes throughout the house. The little scuffles over who’s turn it is to play video games. The jokes they tell, the music they play and sing, and the requests to play outside with them. At dinner, you miss them “accidentally burping” and blaming other bodily functions on each other. I know what you are thinking, how do you miss all of that? but somehow you still do because it is a piece of them.

You find yourself wondering throughout the day what they are doing and wishing you could talk them all the time. You find yourself listening intently for your phone to ring in hopes it is them just to say, “hi!” You find yourself counting down the hours until you get to see each other again. You find yourself thinking the house is way too quiet without them in it.


The hardest goodbyes are watching my kids go away, but these hard goodbyes make all the moments with them even sweeter. It makes you cherish all the moments that everyone else takes for granted. It makes you grateful for the time you do have. It makes you love a little more while they are with you. The reason why I feel the pain when they leave is because I love them so much, and every time I feel that pain makes me realize I love them even more than I did the last time they left.





baby, Kids, Mom Life, My Life

The Number One Worst Mistake You Make While Nursing

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Back in the day (2004 and 2006) when I was having the boys I loved nursing them! I loved the 10-minute intervals throughout the day I was able to spend with them thinking about all the hopes and dreams I had for them and watching them grow before my very eyes.

Fast forward 13 years and I am once again sitting on the couch nursing a baby so many times a day because he loves to eat! No joke, he eats 4 times throughout the night and then eats another 9 times throughout the day. I spend at least 4 hours a day nursing Tony. I am so serious because I have timed it!

During this time I am pretty much stuck in one spot unable to get up and use the bathroom, have limited range of motion to help other kids, I can’t get up to go make dinner, I just get to sit there, and since “just sitting” is a little boring I begin to multi task (because let’s be honest, all women love to multitask) and I so I pick up my phone and begin checking my email, paying bills, grocery shopping, which then leads to checking Facebook, Instagram, and all my other social media accounts. I then move on to playing a game or texting a friend all while sitting nursing my baby!

When it is time to feed Tony, I begin thinking, “Okay where is his pacifier, where’s his blanket, Oh! Where is my phone? And yes, if I don’t know exactly where it is I will look for it before feeding him. And on those rare occasions where I make it to the couch to feed him without it, I have been known to wander around the house feeding him to grab my phone on multiple occasions.

You Might Be Asking Yourself

Why is using my phone while nursing my baby a problem? I thought this too for a long time, in fact, I didn’t see a problem at all until I saw a HUGE PROBLEM!

You see my problem all started when I spent so much time at the hospital when Tony was born. I was all by myself all day and all night while he laid doing phototherapy, so I would just sit and play on my phone. Because of his sugar issues, I needed to feed him at least every two hours all day and all night long for the first few weeks of his life. Feedings lasted 20-30 minutes at a time. That was at least 4 hours of my life that I dedicated to feeding him, EVERY SINGLE DAY. It became very routine. The days were long, and the nights were longer. I began to rely on my phone as a timer as well as a source to just keep me awake during the feedings.

I began by reading on my phone, but then that would put me to sleep, so I became a Facebook scroller, acquired an Instagram account, so I could scroll there as well, I became a gamer, (if I could just beat one more level of candy crush), and I became an even bigger texter.

Over the next several (7) months this became my norm. I would sit down to nurse Tony and immediately pick up my phone, I would always justify it as multitasking, and I was good with it until I realized what I was doing one day!

What Was I Doing that was so Bad?

You see… Here’s what happened. I was sitting there feeding Tony (it was about the time that he was beginning to sitting up and he was rolling everywhere and was becoming so distracted),  and he just kept moving, he would squirm this way, then that way and then he would start to drink and then immediately move his head in another direction to look at something allowing milk to squirt everywhere, and I was trying to LOOK AT SOMETHING ON MY PHONE.

Annoyed at the situation I set my phone down and got him all set up again. I picked up my phone and he immediately did it again, but this time grabbing my phone, trying to get it in his mouth.

“No, Tony,” I said annoyed again at the situation…

At that very moment, I knew there was a problem, and it wasn’t my baby grabbing my phone!

At that very moment, I realized I was addicted to my phone.

I was choosing to “get something else done” rather than focusing on making sure that he would sit there and eat. I knew he was at the age where everything else is more interesting than eating and I feeding his curiosity with this bright screen right next to his head.

I began to reflect back and think about when the last time I sat down for an entire feeding without my phone, and I couldn’t think of one, not a single one! I then began to think of other free moments I had. Every single one of these moments I found myself realizing that there was always a phone in my hand.

At that moment I decided I needed a Phone Detox, especially while nursing!

Have you done this as a nursing mom?

Do you find yourself always picking up your phone during feedings?

Do you find yourself picking up your phone and “checking it” at every free moment you have?

How Did We Become Addicted to Our Phones?

Let’s face it, our brains have trained us well to NEED that small screen always in front of us! With every ding and notification we receive, a little voice inside of us cheers with the thought that we Just received a message from a friend, a new follower on Instagram, or another life on our favorite game and we get excited!

We have become a society that uses our phones for everything from calling people, to finding directions to where we are going, to playing games and scrolling through news feeds. We use them to not only distract us from what is going on around us, but we use them as our number one source of entertainment.

Addiction to our phones didn’t happen overnight. It started with us innocently reading a book, or checking our email, or scrolling through Facebook for 5-minutes while nursing. It then turned into 5-minutes every feeding, which somehow made it to the whole feeding. And then if you are really like me, it turned into continuing to play on your phone because you have a sleeping baby on you who really needs to nap, so you think to yourself “what else am I going to do?” so you just keep scrolling and clicking.

Do you do this too?

We have now turned our special bonding moments with our babies, that we will never get back, into mind-numbing scrolling, just because we felt like we needed something to do because perhaps you are like me and felt like nursing your baby was not enough and felt the need to multitask.

There are so many moms out there that began picking up their phones while nursing their babies, it became innocent, just like mine did, but months, even years later after they were done nursing their babies they admit that they are still addicted to their smartphones picking them up 20 times a day for several minutes at a time.

I Decided it was Time to Take Back My LIfe and Get Off My Phone. Are you ready to join me too?

You might be wondering how do we even start to break the cycle we started?

Well, with this 7-day plan we will be off our smartphones in no time!

Here’s How!

Day 1 (Monday)

  • Clean UP Your Social Media- Unfollow people that you don’t talk to anymore. Unsubscribe to pages and groups that you don’t use anymore.
  • Clean Up Your Apps- Are there apps that you don’t want anymore? Delete those. Are there games that you have that suck all your time away? It is time for those to go too! Are there shopping apps that you have to check every single day at 6am to make sure you get it before it is all gone, or that you spend too much money on? Delete those too.
  • Clean up your Email- Unsubscribe to all the emails that you NEVER open.

Day 2 (Tuesday)

  • Turn Off Your Push Notifications- I know how hard this is! One of my favorite things used to be to pick up my phone first thing in the morning and see if I had any new IG followers, Twitter Followers, or new Likes on our Facebook Page. This “simple check” turned into the first 15 minutes of my day staring at my phone rather than being productive.
  • Put your phone somewhere that you don’t go all the time and put it on vibrate (leave it on Vibrate for Detox Week and keep it in this location when not in use or charging)– When your phone is on vibrate you aren’t tempted to stop playing with your kids or making dinner to rush to see who is calling/ texting you. Trust me, whatever it is, is probably not that important. I set mine on my kitchen counter. It is far enough away to not distract me, but close enough that I can tap the screen every now and again to make sure my kids or husband haven’t called.

Day 3 (Wednesday)

  • Resist the urge to pick up your phone first thing in the morning! Get through your whole morning routine without looking at your phone. Need a morning routine? Check ours out here, you will love it! Once you get through it all, you can check your phone for 5 minutes. Set a timer. This teaches you to get through the most important things and not carelessly scroll for hours.
  • While in the car, leave your phone in your purse. Don’t immediately call a friend or your mom. Enjoy who is in the car with you, or if you are by yourself, enjoy a little peace and quiet. I guarantee the first time you do this it will feel really weird, but just keep doing it and you will begin to love the quiet time you have to just think and reflect.

Day 4 (Thursday)

  • Set up a new Charging Location that is not in your room. Our electronics charge in the laundry room. In our house, there is a rule that all phones need to be plugged in by 8:30pm. I always felt exempt from this rule, but I decided that it might be good for me too, so I plug my phone in at least an hour before bed.

You know what happened when I started doing this?

I was actually tired and could fall right asleep when I went to bed, rather than just checking one more thing while laying in bed!

Day 5 (Friday)

  • Go 2 hours in the morning without looking/ checking your phone and 2 hours in the afternoon or night. When the two hours is up you can see if someone has called or texted you and if they have you can look at them and respond, but then put it right back. You might have huge anxiety doing this… It’s because your brain is telling you that you need your phone when in all actuality you don’t.
  • Go out to Dinner with your family and leave your phone in your purse the whole time. Don’t pull it out to even check the time. Just enjoy being in the moment with your family

Day 6 (Saturday)

  • Take the Day off from all Social Media and Games

Day 7 (Sunday)

  • Leave your phone plugged in all day and don’t use it.

After Phone Detox, Now What?

After you go through your 7 Day Detox you will (hopefully) no longer be addicted to your phone! Continue to plug it in an hour before bed in the same place outside your bedroom. Continue to keep it on vibrate for much of the day with it living in the spot you left it during your detox. Consider limiting your own screen time with an app or Circle by Disney, which is actually how I limit my kids’ screen time.

But What Do I Do While I am Nursing?

A new habit I have gotten into is reading books to our toddler or reading an actual book! I place it off to the side of me out of the way that is not distracting to Tony, but to be honest, my favorite thing to do is to play with his bald little head (will he ever get hair?), or watch him squirm around, or hold his tiny little hands. After detoxing from my phone I have loved just watching him grow during these bonding moments that will all slip away too quickly. I know when they are gone I will be wishing for them back, so I am so glad I was able to recognize that I was addicted to my phone and detox while there was still time to enjoy my last Nursing Baby like I enjoyed my first two so many years ago.

I know giving up your phones while nursing is hard! Trust me! I just went through it, but I promise you it is so worth it in the long run because these moments will soon be gone!

Who’s ready to join me on the detox journey?

Comment Below!

Let’s support one another!

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Kids, Mom Life, parenting, Parenting is hard

Sometimes I Don’t Have it in Me

LifeUnEdited Week #4

I promised I would give you life UnEdited each week, so here it is me getting real with you with my adventures of Parenting and Marriage! If you are just joining us, click here to find out just why we are giving you Life UnEdited!

Sometimes I Don’t Have it in Me

Some days I just don’t have it in me to be a mom and a blogger, and to be all honest being a mom comes first. There are those days that I am able to sit and write and promote on social media for hours while the kids play around me and they take long naps so I can focus on my blogs, blogging-lifebut then there are days that at first sign of the computer opening they start the whining and the clinging to my side.


I know to be what they call, a “successful blogger” you need to dedicate ALL YOUR TIME to blogging all day long, but I can’t, I can’t because I care about my kids too much! Do I wish I could pull all-nighters every night to get it all done? Of course, but that’s not reality.

Between kids, church callings, board positions, being a good wife, and a blogger, something always has to give, and it usually is my blog.

My sad lonely blogging chair, when life needs me…

So you know those days when you think to yourself, “I’m going to go read my favorite blog, Confessions of Parenting (wink, wink)” and you don’t see a new post, just know that life is happening and occupying a little more of my time than normal, but don’t worry I will always be back…

So on those days that I don’t have it me to answer your comments or respond to your questions, know that I read each and every one of them! Know that I love hearing from you. Know that you are all the reason that I keep writing. Know that I write my blog for all of you! Know that I share the inner workings of our crazy family life to hopefully make a difference in yours. So, Thank You for always being there for me, even on those days that I don’t have it in me because I am busy being a mom to my kids who really need me that day!









Mom Life, My Life

5 Steps For Making New Mom Friends After a Move

5 Steps For Making New Mom Friends After a Move

After moving to a new state, my focus was getting the kids acclimated to our new area. I got them involved in activities and that helped them to make friends. A few months went by, and I realized I had no friends myself! I had put so much of my focus and attention on the kids that I had completely neglected myself.

Having mom friends or a mom tribe helps to keep you sane. They become your people. They’re who you call for a middle of the night emergency. They help you out at a moments notice because they understand life happens. But first, you have to find those people.

Finding new friends as an adult is not fun. We are usually set in our ways, and we do not have the time, patience, or energy for mama drama. So what’s a girl to do?

How Do We Find New Mom Friends?

Step 1: I showed up. Instead of just dropping kids off at activities or practices, I actually stayed. I put names to faces and figured out which kids belonged to which parents. Once I had that figured out, I could then muster up the nerve to approach and say, “You’re Molly’s mom, right?” Even though I darn well knew she was Molly’s mom, it was an easy icebreaker.

Step 2: Start talking! Beginning small talk is the stepping stone to putting yourself out there. It might be awkward, but hopefully, it gets better. If not, move on and hope for better results next time.

Step 3: Look for common ground. Not sure what to say? Look for “a me too” moment. Did someone show up late, or did someone forget something? Empathize and share your own oops moment. It helps ease that persons shame and embarrassment, and it makes you totally relatable.

Step 4: Be authentic. Don’t try to be somebody you’re not. People can see right through fakeness. While finding common ground is helpful, it’s also not required to make a friend. I’m not into all of the same things as some of my friends, and that’s okay! We love each other anyway.

Step 5: Keep trying. You’re not going to click with everyone you meet, and that’s okay. Someone may remain an acquaintance only, while others you meet become family. Keep trying, follow the steps, and soon you’ll have a few new friends.

As with anything else, there are always some don’ts that go along with the Do’s. Sometimes trying to make new mom friends can even feel like dating! Momma doesn’t have time for that!

The Don’t of Finding Mom Friends

When looking for new friends:

Don’t over analyze. I’m guilty of doing this. Did I say the wrong thing? Were my kids well behaved? Was I dressed weird? Was there something in my teeth? I could go on and on. Save yourself the trouble and just don’t do it.

Don’t Facebook stalk. Seriously. I know it’s so tempting. We all know it isn’t the best real-life representation of someone’s life. Don’t start the comparison game and think there’s no way you two could be friends because your lives are so different. It’s okay to look to see their highlights, but don’t get sucked into believing their life is as perfect as Facebook makes it seem.

Don’t fret over potential hangouts. If the person said, “We should go out for a drink sometime,” don’t sit there in anguish constantly checking your phone wondering when or if they will text you. If they genuinely meant it, it will happen. Otherwise, move on. You’ll hear from them when you hear from them.

Moving is tough. Making new friends doesn’t have to be. When you follow these steps, you’ll have yourself a new mom tribe in no time. And hopefully, it’ll feel like you’ve known each other your whole lives. I know these steps have helped me each time my family has moved. I hope they can help you too!

Written by Stacy. Stacy is an intern that is currently finishing up her degree in marriage and family studies. We are so glad to have her working with us this semester. 

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Kids, Mom Life, parenting, Parenting is hard

I Turned Around for Two Seconds

LifeUnEdited Week #3

I promised I would give you life UnEdited each week, so here it is me getting real with you with my adventures of Parenting and Marriage! If you are just joining us, click here to find out just why we are giving you Life UnEdited!


I Turned Around for Two Seconds

You know the saying, “I turned around for two seconds.” Well, it happened to me the other night… I turned around for two seconds and you aren’t going to believe what happened?!

It all started when I was in the kitchen making dinner for my people. My kids were starving (apparently), but I kept reminding them and insisting that dinner would be on the table in just 1 minute.

My older kids were “watching their younger brother” while watching a show on Netflix, which translates to me asking, “Where is Mason?!” pretty consistently now that he is super mobile. After asking a handful of times   I didn’t get an answer, so I rush into the living room and then I saw it, something green around his mouth and on his fingers, so I go in for a closer look… “What the heck is this?”


Yep, you read that right. Play-doh…

Are you flipping kidding me?! How on Earth did he find play-doh?


It seems as though it took way too long for me to make dinner according to the nine-month-old, I guess he knew that it was another night of Hamburger Helper, Go Me!

Please tell me I’m not the only mom on this planet that has let their kid take a bite of this stuff in lieu of their awesome cooking skills!

~Written by Shiree. Shiree is an intern that is currently finishing up her degree in marriage and family studies. We are so glad to have her working with us this semester.






baby, Kids, Mom Life, parenting, Parenting is hard

3 Surprisingly Simple Steps to Connect with your Child

How-to-Connect-with-your-kidsWe all have a desire to be close to each one of our children. This connection is important for their growth and happiness. Kids that are more connected with their parents are more likely to want to do good and make their parents happy.

We all want to be close to our children, but let’s be honest many times life gets in the way, our schedules are all busy, and it is hard to get that connection time that we both need. And then on top of that, we spend much of the time shaping and correcting them so they turn out to be AMAZING RESPONSIBLE ADULTS, which at times comes across as nagging, yelling or criticizing them for what they are or aren’t doing. Did you know research suggests for every negative interaction (yelling, criticizing, nagging) we need to have 5 Positive interactions to make up for it?

You might be thinking to yourself about now, how on Earth can I do it all so that my child feels loved and I can connect with them every day and make up for all the negative interactions? I will let you in on a little secret I learned….

Ready for it?

The more time you spend connecting with your kids each day, the stronger your bond will become, and in time you will start to see less and less negative interactions!

Don’t believe me?

With these Surprisingly Simple Steps, you will Start Connecting with your child on a whole new level and your connection will GROW!


Kids need tangible, physical contact with a parent every day. In fact, they need at least 8 touches a day. When your kids are small and cuddly it seems like an easier task, but as they get older this can become more difficult. Think outside the box, perhaps a small hug, high fives, pats on the back, secret handshakes, a touch on the arm, or moving hair out of their eyes.


When we classify talk, it’s not just any “small talk”. You need to engage your child in at least one worthwhile conversation every day. This talk needs to have eye to eye interaction! This is essential for all KIDS! So stop what you are doing, slow down, and look them in the eyes as you communicate.


You want to spend 9 Meaningful Minutes A Day!

The first 3 minutes of the day, right after they wake up.

The 3 minutes after they walk in the door after school.

The last 3 minutes of the day, right before bed.

These 9 minutes of the day can have a powerful and significant influence on your child. But they can also be the most challenging minutes of the day. Start by shutting down electronics, getting off of the phone, and actively engaging your child for 3 minutes. Set the tone for your child by being positive, encouraging, and patient.

There it is. Nothing too crazy. Simply intentional and meaningful parenting.

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