Ultrasound day is always an exciting day. This is what happened when my 20 week ultrasound showed abnormalities and how I coped with the worry.
It was an exciting day in February; it was ultrasound day! The boys had convinced us that they should go with us to see if we were having a boy or a girl. After much convincing, we finally agreed reluctantly after remembering how Colby reacted (whaling and gnashing of teeth stating that she will NEVER go to any of his sports games) when we told him we were having a girl two years ago!
Prepping For the UltraSound
As we arrived at our ultrasound we headed into the small room. I climbed onto the table and got ready. The boys and Ty were excited. The ultrasound tech was typing notes on the screen, one which stated no abnormalities, which we could see on the TV on the wall.
As the ultrasound began we all actively searched for little boy parts. I thought I had spotted something, but didn’t want to say anything. After a few minutes, we got the news that we were all there for!
Are you serious?
The tech looked at us and said, “It’s a boy!” The boys hooted and hollered and Ty with a huge grin on his face stated, “Are you serious?” The tech said, “Serious. Look here.” As we looked we definitely saw it was a boy!
Continuing to See our Baby
The ultrasound continued and we saw his limbs, his heart, his lungs, everything. We finally made it to his brain. I begin to see these asterisks get put on his brain. Not thinking much about it I just keep watching trying to control the boys because they might not have been on their best behaviors at this point.
All of a sudden I see the tech go back to the original screen and delete No Abnormalities. I quickly panic and ask if something is wrong. I am basically told she can’t tell me. She then flips back to the baby and I ask, “Is that his brain?” She confirms that it is. I wonder what those 4 asterisks mean; what is wrong? The tech finishes up and says that she is going to go get the doctor. Oh Crap! What is Wrong?
Nothing to Worry About!
My doctor came around the corner with a smile. I must have looked panicked because she smiled even bigger and said that we had nothing to worry about. She stated that there were cysts on the choroid
. She said that it was no big deal and we had nothing to worry about. We would go to a level 2 ultrasound once the referral went through. We had a million questions, all of them unanswered.
The Waiting Game
Ty and I agreed that we didn’t know enough to tell anyone, so I had to deal with all these feelings alone. It was a slow quiet drive home. I still remember the uneasiness and the feelings of inadequacies . The feeling that I had done something wrong. The feeling of being so alone. The next day came and went with no call about another ultrasound. I began to research what exactly cysts on the choroid were and what it could lead to. That’s when I read those horrible words that I will never forget, Trisomy 18.
Trisomy 18 Concerns
is a probability when there are this many cysts on the brain. It basically is an abnormality that happens during cell division giving you an extra chromosome 18. From what I read there is only 50% chance that your baby will be born alive, but even then they will have significant delays.
The Day Finally Came
I finally heard from the doctor’s office and got my appointment scheduled two weeks after my first ultrasound. I saw one of the best OB Specialists in the Dallas area. He was amazing. He was so comforting and explained everything to us. We saw every intricate detail of our sweet baby. He looked perfect, not a single abnormality. We looked at his brain and I began to feel anxious. The doctor looked at his brain with great detail and let us know that there was one cyst present. Wait, what? One! I was so relieved to hear that because where did all the others go? Did they disappear? Did we just witness a miracle?
After the ultrasound, the specialist said that he was not worried about a thing. He said he was 99% sure that we would have a perfect baby boy. What a relief that was to hear!
Do I still worry a little bit? I would be crazy to say that I am not a little worried, but then again faith and fear cannot exist together. We must put our faith in the Lord’s hands and know that he will do what is meant to be, so for now our precious boy will continue to grow healthy and strong and we will continue to trust in the Lord and just pray that the two words “No Abnormalities” are what this sweet boy has!
~Update: We delivered a healthy baby boy in late June! To read more about our delivery click here!
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