115+ Best Winter Jokes for Kids That Are Snow Funny [Free Joke Cards]

Last Updated on March 19, 2024 by Michele Tripple

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Hey there, snow-tastic friends! Ready to embark on a frosty adventure that’s cooler than a polar bear’s toenails? Winter may be all about snowflakes, hot cocoa, and warm mittens, but let’s not forget the avalanche of giggles it brings, especially with these winter jokes for kids!

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Ever wonder why snowmen are always smiling? Maybe they’ve heard all the winter jokes… or maybe they’re just super chill. Either way, get ready for some ice-cold zingers!

Get ready to gather around the fireplace, or better yet, a snow fort, as we plunge into the world of winter wisecracks. In this blizzard of belly-laughs, we’ll find out if snowmen prefer skinny jeans (spoiler: they melt for them!) and what kind of ball doesn’t bounce (a snowball, of course!). Trust me, these winter jokes are snow joke; they’re flake-tastic!

From icicles to igloos, we’ve got a flurry of funnies that’ll keep you laughing all season long. Even if you’re the kind of person who gets cold feet (literally and figuratively), these winter jokes are sure to warm your heart. So put on your funniest snow boots, and let’s slide into a wonderland of winter humor.

Before we dive into the snowbank of silliness, a quick word of advice: always laugh with mittens on. Why you ask? Because cold hands warm the heart, but laughing hands spread the joy! And if you ever feel a brain freeze coming on from too many cool jokes, just remember: it’s all in snow good fun!

For even more laughs, be sure to check out our elf jokes and our autumn jokes.

 
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Best Winter Jokes for Kids

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  • What did one snowman say to the other snowman? “Can you smell carrots?”
  • What kind of ball doesn’t bounce? A snowball.
  • Where does a snowman keep his money? In a snowbank.
  • Where does a snowman get the weather report? The winternet.
  • How do snowmen read their emails?  With an icy-stare!
  • What is that one thing you catch in winter while keeping your eyes closed? A cold
  • What do you call ten rabbits hopping backwards through the snow together? A receding hare line.
  • What food do you get when you cross Frosty with a polar bear? A “brrr” – “grrr”.
  • What did the icy road say to the car? “Want to go for a spin?”
  • Where do you go to learn about the history of ice cream? Sundae School.
  • How does a snowman convince someone he’s serious? “Snow joke!”
  • What is the best kind of breakfast cereal to eat in the winter? Frosted Flakes!
  • How do snowmen read their texts? With an icy stare.
  • How did Jack Frost get to work? By icicle.
  • What often falls at the North Pole and never gets hurt? Snow.
  • What do you have in December that’s not in any other month? The letter D
  • What do yeti on diets eat? Iceberg lettuce
  • What does a gingerbread man put on his bed? A cookie sheet!
  • Why did the girl keep her trumpet out in the snow? She liked playing cool jazz.
  • What did Frosty call his cow? Eski-moo
  • What kind of math do you think snowy owls would like? Owlgebra
  • If the sun shines while it’s snowing, what should you look for? Snowbows.
  • Why did the boy keep his trumpet out in the snow? Because he liked cool music.
  • How do polar bears make their beds? With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
  • How do mountains stay warm? They put on their snowcaps.
  • What is red, white, and blue over winter break? A sad candy cane.
  • Which one is faster: hot or cold? Hot. You can catch a cold.
  • What’s white and goes up? A confused snowflake.
  • How do you know when it’s too chilly for a picnic? When you chip your tooth on the soup!
  • What’s brown and sneaks around the kitchen? Mince spies
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  • What did one skier say to the other? Alpine for you when you’re gone
  • What do you call a snowman that tells tall tales? A snow-fake!
  • What do you call a penguin in the Sahara desert? Lost.
  • What’s the weatherman’s favorite food in winter? Brrr-itos!
  • What does Frosty’s wife put on her face at night? Cold cream
  • What does the snowman outside the store say to the customers? Have an ice day!
  • What does Jack Frost like best about school? Snow and tell.
  • What do you call it when a snowman throws a temper tantrum? A meltdown.
  • Why is the slippery ice like music? If you don’t C sharp – you’ll B flat.
  • What’s a snowman’s favorite meat? Cold cuts!
  • If your reindeer lost his tail, where would you go to buy him a new one? A retail store!
  • How do snowmen buy birthday presents? With cold, hard cash.
  • How did the snow globe feel after the scary story? A little shaken.
  • How do you build a snow fort? You igloo it together.
  • How did the snow globe feel after listening to a scary story? A bit shaken up!
  • Who were Frosty’s parents? Mom and Pop-sicle.
  • Why did the husband pour warm water on his computer? He had asked his wife what to do if windows froze. 
  • Why did the snowman go to the doctor? He was feeling chilled!
  • Knock, knock! Who’s there? Atch! Atch, who? Bless you.
  • What does a Snowman take when he gets sick? A chill pill
  • How would two snowmen greet each other? “Ice to meet you!”
  • How do you know that a snowman crawled into your bed with you? You wake up wet and there’s a carrot on your pillow.
  • Why do reindeer have fur coats? Because they look silly in snow suits.
  • What’s the difference between a Christmas alphabet and the regular alphabet? The Christmas alphabet has Noel.
  • Why was the snowman looking in the bag of carrots? He was picking his nose!
  • What snack should you make for the Snowman Holiday Party? “Ice Krispy treats.”
  • What did the tree say after a long winter? What a re-leaf!
  • How do you keep from getting cold feet during the winter? Don’t walk around BRRRRfooted.
  • What two letters of the alphabet do snowmen prefer? I.C.
  • What happened to the man who stole a calendar from the store? He got 12 months.
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  • Knock, Knock! Who’s there? Icy. Icy, who? Icy you!
  • How does a snowman get to work? By icicle.
  • What did the hat say to the scarf? You hang around while I go on ahead.
  • Why did the bear keep getting fired? He always disappeared in the winter.
  • How do snowmen greet each other? Ice to meet you.
  • What did the snowman order at the fast food restaurant? An ice burger extra cheese.
  • What’s an ig? A house made of ice, without a loo!
  • Knock, knock! Who’s there? Scold. Scold, who? ‘Scold outside!
  • What do you call a snowman’s dog? A slush puppy!
  • How can you scare a snowman? Point a hair dryer at him.
  • What do you sing at a snowman’s birthday party? “Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow!”
  • Why did the two snowmen divorce? One thought the other was a flake.
  • How can you farm during the winter? Use a snow plow.
  • What do you call a penguin with no eye? A pengun!
  • What kind of fish do penguins catch at night? Starfish.
  • How do polar bears make their beds? With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
  • What do you call a ghost in the winter? Casp-brrr.
  • What bites with no teeth? Frost!
  • If a penguin steals a baby octopus, what do we call him? A SQUIDnapper
  • What do snowmen do on Christmas? Play with the snow angels.
  • Where do penguins go to the movies? At the DIVE-in!
  • Why are winter days great? They’re snow much fun!
  • How do you know that a snowman was in your home? You find a carrot next to the fireplace.
  • What do you call ten rabbits hopping backward through the snow together? A receding hare line.
  • What do you call it when a snowman ignores you? The cold shoulder.
  • When is a polar bear not a polar bear? When it’s in a grizzly mood!
  • What do you call a snowman in the summer? A puddle.
  • Why did Frosty go to the middle of the big lake? Because snow man’s an island.
  • What did the police officer say when he saw the snowman stealing? Freeze!
  • Why was the king penguin’s wife so misunderstood? She was a total ice queen.
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  • What do snowmen win at the Olympics? “Cold” medals!
  • What’s the scariest part of owing Santa money? He snows where you live.
  • Why do you think penguins swim in salty water? Because pepper water would make them sneeze 
  • Knock, Knock! Who’s There? Snow! Snow, who? Snow laughing matter. 
  • Which winter month do people sleep the least? February
  • What do you call a glove combined with a snake? Smitten.
  • How do you scare a snowman? Two words: Global Warming
  • Why are bad school grades like a shipwreck in the Arctic Ocean? They’re both below C level!
  • Why don’t you see penguins in Britain? They’re afraid of Wales.
  • Why did Princess Elsa fall off her sled? She let it go.
  • How do you know that a snowman was in your home? You find a carrot in a puddle next to the fireplace.
  • What did the investigator say to the snowman? Icy right through your lies.
  • Why do birds fly south for the winter? Because it’s too far to walk.
  • What do snowmen say when they are sad? They had a Blue Christmas.
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Do you have more winter jokes for kids that you love? Share them in the comments so we can laugh too!

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Printable Winter Jokes

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