125 Ap-Peeling Monkey Jokes For Kids

Last Updated on May 28, 2022 by Michele Tripple

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These monkey jokes for kids are very ap-peeling to kids! So go grab a banana split and get ready for a lot of monkey business and laughs with these monkey jokes!

feature image: monkey jokes for kids with a monkey holding a banana

Jokes are such a fun way to monkey around with the kids and really share lots of laughs.

We aren’t monkeying around with these jokes! These are all good clean wholesome jokes that won’t make you go hide on the monkey bars.

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pin image: monkey jokes for kids with a monkey holding a banana

The Best Monkey Jokes For Kids

Q: What’s a monkey’s favorite game?

A: Hangman.
monkey joke for kids question: What's a monkey's favorite game? A: Hangman. on a brown background

Q: How do you stop an ape from charging?

A: Take away its credit card.

Q: How do monkeys get down the stairs?

A: They slide down the banana-ster.

Q: Where do monkeys get their gossip?

A: On the ape vine.
 
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Q: What’s furry and dangerous and lives in a tree?

A: A monkey with a machine gun.

Q: Do monkeys like bananas?

A: Ape-solutley!

Q: What do you call an easily scared monkey?

A: A chimp-pansy.

Q: What do you call a monkey who loves Pringles?

A: Chipmunk.

Q: What do you call a monkey in a minefield?

A: Baboom!

Q: Why don’t monkeys play cards on the savannah?

A: Too many cheetahs around!
monkey joke for kids question: Why don't monkeys play cards on the savannah?  A: Too many cheetahs around! on a brown background

Q: Why did the monkey put a net over its head?

A: It wanted to catch its breath.

Today I learnt that humans eat more bananas than monkeys.

I can’t remember the last time I ate a monkey!

Q: What is a monkey’s favorite dance move?

A: The banana split.

Q: Why did the monkey take its banana to the doctors?

A: It wasn’t peeling good.
 
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Q: What do you call a monkey flying in the sky?

A: A hot air baboon!

Q: Which side of a monkey has more hair?

A: The outside.

Q: What happens when you double-cross a monkey?

A: They go bananas.

Q: What do you call a monkey at the south pole?

A: Lost!

Q: If there were no bananas, what fruit would monkeys choose?

A: Ape-ricots.

Q: Why did the monkey cross the road?

A: Because the chicken had the day off.
monkey joke for kids question: Why did the monkey cross the road?  A: Because the chicken had the day off. on orange background

Q: What kind of monkey sounds like a sheep?

A: A baaa-boon.

Q: What do you call a crowd of monkeys?

A: An Orangatangle.

Q: Why do monkeys carry their babies on their backs?

A: Because it’s too hard dragging a buggy up those trees.

Q: What happens when monkeys gets fleas?

A: Lunch!

Q: What is a monkeys favourite Christmas song?

A: Jungle Bells.

Q: Why did King Kong climb the Empire State building?

A: Because he couldn’t fit in the lift.

Q: What d’you call a monkey with a banana in each ear?

A: Anything you like, it won’t be able to hear you!

Q: What do you call an angry monkey?

A: Furious George.

Q: What do you call a man who can jump from tree to tree?

A: A monkey’s uncle.

Q: What do you call a monkey with a wand and a broomstick?

A: Hairy Potter
monkey joke for kids question: What do you call a monkey with a wand and a broomstick? A: Hairy Potter on pink background

Two monkeys run a bath. One says, “ooh ooh ooh ah ah ah!”.

The other says, “put some cold in it!”

Q: Where do baby monkeys sleep?

A: In ape-ri-cots.

Q: What do monkeys get when they sunbathe?

A: An orangu-tan.
 
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Q: Where should a monkey go if she loses her tail?

A: To a re-tail-er.

Q: What kind of key unlocks a banana?

A: A mon-key.

Q: What do monkeys wear when they are cooking?

A: Ape-rons.

Q: Why did the monkey like the banana?

A: It was ap-peal-ing.

Q: What do you call a monkey that’s in charge of its tree?

A: A Branch Manager!

Q: What do you call a restaurant that throws food in your face?

A: A Monkey Business.

Q: What do you call poorly monkeys?

A: Gor-ILL-as.
monkey joke for kids question: What do you call poorly monkeys? A: Gor-ILL-as. on pink background

Q: What do you call an angry monkey that loves fruit?

A: Grr-ape.

Q: Where do monkeys go for a drink?

A: The monkey bars!

Q: What’s a monkey’s favorite teacher at Hogwarts?

A: Professor Sn-ape.

Q: What do monkeys do at work?

A: Monkey business.
 
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Q: What’s kind of monkey will liven up a party?

A: A funk-key.

Q: What’s a monkey’s favourite kind of computer?

A: An Ape-le mac.

Q: What did the banana say to the chimp?

A: Nothing. Bananas can’t talk.

Q: What do you call a baby monkey that takes after its mum?

A: A Chimp off the old block.

Q: What do monkeys do for laughs?

A: They tell jokes about people.

Q: What do you tell a naughty monkey?

A: Stop chimping about.
monkey joke for kids question: What do you tell a naughty monkey? A: Stop chimping about. on brown background

Q: What does a woodcutter say before he chops down a tree in the rainforest?

A: Let the chimps fall where they may.

Q: What should you bring to a party in the jungle?

A: Chimps and dip!

Q: What do you call a monkey who wins every sport?

A: A chimpion.

Q: How do you get an escaped lion back into its habitat?

A: You use a bargaining chimp.

Q: What’s a monkey’s favorite drink?

A: Chimpan-tea!
 
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Q: What’s a chimp’s favorite baked good?

A: Banana bread.

Q: What are monkeys’ favorite biscuits?

A: Chocolate chimp cookies.

Q: What did the banana do when it saw a gorilla?

A: The banana split.

Q: Why shouldn’t you get into a fight with a monkey?

A: They use gorilla warfare.

Q: Why do gorillas have big nostrils?

A: Because they have big fingers!
monkey joke for kids question: Why do gorillas have big nostrils?  A: Because they have big fingers! on brown background

Q: What’s the first thing a gorilla learns in school?

A: The ape b c’s.

Q: What do you call a gorilla that weighs 150kg?

A: Sir!

Q: How did the gorilla know she was poorly?

A: She had a belly ape.

Q: Why did the Gorilla fail its exam?

A: He didn’t have the ape-titude.

Q: What should you do if you find a gorilla sitting at your school desk?

A: Sit somewhere else!

Q: What’s the best time of year to see gorillas in the wild?

A: Ape-ril.

Q: Did you hear about that lame party in the jungle? 

A: Someone forgot to bring the chimps and dip. 

Q: Why do monkeys love bananas? 

A: Because they have appeal.

 Q: Why shouldn’t you fight with a monkey? 

A: They use gorilla warfare. 

Q: What kind of underwear do monkeys wear? 

A: Chimpantsies. 
monkey joke for kids question: What kind of underwear do monkeys wear? A: Chimpantsies.  on orange background

Q: What do you call a monkey who can’t keep a secret? 

A: A blab-boon. 

Q: What does a monkey wear while cooking? 

A: An ape-ron. 

Two monkeys are in the bath. One turns to the other and says, “Oooo ooo aah aahh!” 

The second monkey says, “Well, put some cold in then!”

 Q: What do you call a monkey with a banana in each ear? 

A: Anything you want, he can’t hear you. 

Q: Why don’t monkeys wear pocket watches? 

A: Because they don’t wear pants. 
 
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Q: Where do monkeys go to grab a beer? 

A: The monkey bars! 

Q: What came first, the monkey or the ape? 

A: The dinosaur! 

Q: What do you call monkeys who share an Amazon account?  

A: Prime mates.

Q: What kind of monkey likes seafood? 

A: A shrimpanzee. 

Q: What kind of key opens a banana? 

A: A mon-key! 
monkey joke for kids question: What kind of key opens a banana?  A: A mon-key!  on pink background

Q: What does a banana do when it sees a monkey? 

A: The banana splits. 

Q: Why don’t monkeys play cards in the jungle? 

A: There are too many cheetahs around. 

Q: What do you call a monkey that wins the World Series? 

A: A champion. 

Q: How do monkeys get down the stairs? 

A: They slide down the banana-ster. 

Q: How do you catch a monkey?

A:  Climb a tree and act like a banana. 

Q: What do you call a monkey at the North Pole? 

A: Lost. 

Q: What did the banana do when he saw the monkey? 

A: The banana split. 

Q: Where do monkeys go when they lose their tails? 

A: To a retailer. 

Q: If a monkey has 30 bananas in one hand and 40 bananas in the other hand, what does he have? 

A: Huge hands. 

Q: What do you call a monkey that sells potato chips? 

A: A chipmunk. 
monkey joke for kids question: What do you call a monkey that sells potato chips? A: A chipmunk.  on pink background

Q: Where does a 2,000-pound gorilla sit? 

A: Anywhere it wants to. 

Q: If you were in the jungle, and a gorilla charged you, what should you do? 

A: Pay him. 

Q: What’s the difference between a poorly dressed monkey on a tricycle and a well-dressed monkey on a bicycle? 

A: Attire. 

Q: Why did the chimpanzee cross the road?

A:  Because he had to take care of some monkey business. 

Q: Why did the giant ape climb up the side of the skyscraper? 

A: Because the elevator was broken. 

Q: What did the banana say to the monkey? 

A: Nothing, bananas don’t talk. 

Q: Why did the thieves kidnap the monkey? 

A: Because they believed in gibbon take. 

Q: What did the orangutan say to the chimp? 

A: “Ginger’s the new black!” 

Q: What is an orangutan’s favorite cookie? 

A: Chocolate chimp! 

Q: What do you feed a 600-pound orangutan?

A:  Anything it wants! 
monkey joke for kids question: What do you feed a 600-pound orangutan? A:  Anything it wants!   on brown background

Q: What’s white and swings through the trees? 

A: A meranguetan! 

Q: What do you call a monkey who works in a call center?

A:  A who-rang-utang! 

Did you know before they had monkey bars,

monkeys would just drink at home. 

Q: What do you call a monkey in a minefield? 

A: A baboooom! 

Humans eat more bananas than monkeys. 

Although monkeys are more filling.

 In March, I found a monkey paw and used it to wish to work from home every day. 

I’m sorry, everybody. 

Q: What did the monkey say after his tail got caught in the lawnmower?

A:  “Won’t be long now!” 

Q: Humans can catch diseases from monkeys and bats, but why not anteaters? 

A: Because they are filled with anty bodies. 

Q: What does a woodcutter say before he chops down a tree in the rainforest?

A:  “Let the chimps fall where they may.” 

Q: What do monkeys do for laughs? 

A: They tell jokes about people. 
monkey joke for kids question: What do monkeys do for laughs?  A: They tell jokes about people. on brown background

Q: What do you tell a naughty monkey? 

A: “Stop chimping about.” 
 
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Q: What did the banana do when it saw a gorilla? 

A: The banana split. 

Q: Why do gorillas have big nostrils? 

A: Because they have big fingers! 

Q: What’s the first thing a gorilla learns in school? 

A: The ape b c’s. 

Q: What do you call an angry monkey? 

A: Furious George. 

Q: What do you call a monkey with a wand and a broomstick? 

A: Hairy Potter. 

Q: What did the baboon win at the beauty contest? 

A: She won beast of show. 

Q: What did the baboon study in law school? 

A: The law of the jungle. 

Q: What do you get when you cross a baboon and a parrot? 

A: Nobody knows, but if it opened its mouth to speak, you would definitely listen. 

Q: What’s a monkey’s favorite store? 

A: Banana Republic. 
monkey joke for kids question: What’s a monkey’s favorite store? A: Banana Republic.  on orange background

Q: What type of monkey should have eight legs?

A:  A spider monkey. 

Q: What do you call a monkey holding a firecracker?  

A: A ba-BOOM!

Q: Where do monkeys work out? 

A: The jungle gym.

Q: Why are baboons considered the life of the party?

A: Because they’re more fun than a barrel of monkeys.

Q: How did the monkey escape from the zoo?

A: With a monkey wrench.

Have some more monkey jokes for kids? Share them in the comments so that we can add them to the list!

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