100 Briiii-liant Penguin Jokes That Will Crack You Up!

Last Updated on August 2, 2023 by Michele Tripple

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If you’re looking for a good joke to break the ice, look no further! These Penguin Jokes will seal the deal!

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One of the best parts of parenting is getting to laugh with your children. I remember when my kids started making their own jokes as toddlers. They would crack themselves up! Of course, that made my husband and me laugh even harder!

Now that they’re teenagers, their jokes are funny on a different level. They understand the different types of humor, allowing them to make everything they say funny! I love seeing what they come up with on their own. It’s clear that they get their sense of humor from their mama!

The penguin jokes in this list are appropriate for adults and children and are sure to crack you up! Before you waddle away, be sure to check out these other animal jokes: Ap-Peeling Monkey Jokes and the Best Bird Jokes That Make You LOL.

Do your kids love jokes? Grab these fun joke cards for them to laugh at all the time! These are perfect for lunch box jokes, joke cards series, bedtime laughs, and more! Grab them now!

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Best Penguin Jokes

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What is a penguin’s favorite type of dancing?

Pole Dancing.

What do you give to a penguin that’s ill?

Some medical tweetment.

What do penguins do when they want to relax?

Net fish and chill

How does a group of penguins make a difficult decision?

Flipper coin

Why did the two penguins jump when they first met?

They were trying to break the ice.
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What do penguins wear on their heads?

Ice caps.

What do penguins like to wear on the beach?

A beak-ini
 
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Who are good racing car drivers?

Because they are always in pole position.

What is a penguin’s favorite movie?

Frozen

What do you call a cold penguin?

A Birrrr-d
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Why don’t penguins like rock music?

They only like sole

Where do penguins keep their money?

In a snowbank

What’s a penguin’s favorite vegetable?

Iceberg lettuce.

What is a penguin’s favorite family member?

Aunt Africa

Who is a penguin’s favorite pop star?

Seal
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How do penguins drink?

Out of beak-ers

What do penguin’s eat for lunch?

Ice-burgers

Why don’t you see penguins in Britain?

Because they’re afraid of Wales.

Which side of a penguin has the most feathers?

The outside

What does a penguin eat on its birthday?

Fish cakes
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What’s a penguin’s favorite pasta?

Penguini

Where do penguins go to watch movies?

At the dive-in

How do penguins take their Whiskey?

On the rocks.

What’s black, white and red all over?

A penguin with a sunburn.

What do you call fifty penguins at the North Pole?

Really lost , because penguins live in the Southern Hemisphere.
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What do penguins eat for breakfast?

Frosties

What is even smarter than a talking penguin?

A spelling bee

How does a penguin chef make pancakes?

He uses his flippers.

Which bird always gets first place?

A peng-win

What do penguins wear on their feet at night time?

Slippers
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Where do penguins keep their savings?

In a snowbank

Why should you not write a book on penguins?

Because writing a book on paper is much easier

When I meet new people I always talk about my giant pet penguin..

It’s a good ice breaker!

Why do polar bears and penguins not get one?

Because they are polar opposites!

What do you call a penguin with no eye?

Penguin
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Why don’t the penguins jump off of the iceberg?

He got cold feet!

How do penguins know when there’s something wrong?

It smells a bit fishy

How do a group of penguins make a decision?

Flipper coin!

What do penguins sing on a birthday?

Freeze a jolly good fellow!

Why do Penguins carry fish in their beaks?

Because they haven’t got any pockets!
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What kind of fish do Penguins catch at night?

Starfish!

What do Penguins like to eat?

Brrrritos!

What do penguins wear on their heads?

Ice Caps

How does a Penguin build a LEGO house?

Igloos it together!

Why don’t penguins fly?

Because they’re not tall enough to be pilots!
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What did one penguin say to the other?

Nothing, he gave him the cold shoulder!

What’s black and white, black and white, black and white?

A penguin rolling down a hill!

What do you call a penguin in the desert?

Lost

How do you know if a penguin has coronavirus?

Because they have to self ice-olate.

How do penguins know when there’s something wrong?

It smells a bit fishy
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Why did the penguins start jumping on their first date?

They were trying to break the ice.

Where do penguins go to watch movies?

At the dive-in.

Why are penguins so difficult to get along with?

Because they’re always fishing for compliments. 

How do penguins make difficult decisions?

They flipper coins.

What did one penguin say to the other?

Nothing, he gave him the cold shoulder.
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Where do penguins go dancing?

The Snow Ball.

What game do penguins play at a party?

Rock-hopper-scissors

Why is it hard to get along with penguins?

Because they’re always fishing for compliments.

What do you call a penguin in the desert?

Lost

Why did the penguin bride get left at the altar? 

The groom got cold feet.
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What do penguins sing at birthday parties?

Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow

Why don’t penguins and polar bears get along?

Because they are polar opposites

How does a penguin cook burgers?

With his flipped

What is black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin

How do penguins make pancakes?

With their flippers.
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How do you contact a penguin?

Give him a wing

Why didn’t the penguin jump off the iceberg?

He got cold feet

How do penguins pass exams?

They wing it.

Why was penguin Jesus born in a barn?

There was a snow room at the inn.

What do penguins eat for breakfast?

Frosties
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How does a penguin build its house?

Igloos it together

Why are fat penguins so popular at parties?

They know how to break the ice.

What does the penguin waiter say?

Waddle it be

When I become a lawyer, I want to defend a penguin.

Just so I can say, “Your honor! My client isn’t a flight risk”

Where does a penguin go when it loses its tail?

A re-tail store.
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Which side of a penguin has the most feathers?

The outside.

What do you call a cold penguin?

A Brrr-d

Who’s the head of the penguin navy?

Admiral Byrd

What does a n evil penguin lay?

Deviled eggs

Why did the penguin cross the road?

It was the chicken’s day off
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Why did the penguin cross the road twice?

To prove he wasn’t chicken

What did the penguin say after he went shopping?

Put it on my bill.

Where do penguins dance?

The snow ball.

Where does a penguin keep its money?

In a snowbank

What do you get when a penguin lays an egg on a hill?

An eggroll
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Why did the penguin cross the ocean?

To get to the other tide.

What do penguins drink during the summer?

Iced Tea

Where does a 500 pound penguin sit?

Anywhere it wants

How do penguins work?

Out of beak-ers

How do penguins make a decision?

Flipper.com
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What does a magician penguin say?

“Pick a cod, any cod…”

What did the sea say about the penguin?

What did the sea say about the penguin?

What is a penguin racing driver’s favorite part of the car?

The Eggs-celator

Where do penguins go swimming?

At the South Pool!

How do Penguins drink their cola?

On the rocks
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Who is Penguin’s favorite pop star?

Seal

Why was the penguin popular?

Because he was an ice guy.

What do you call a happy penguin?

A Pen-Grin!

What did one Emperor Penguin say to the other?

Nothing, he just gave him the cold shoulder.

Why did the penguin cross the road?

To go with the floe
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Do you have even more penguin jokes that make you laugh? Share them in the comments! Don’t forget to share your favorite penguin joke on Instagram as well!

You can Never Have Too Many Jokes! Complete List of Awesome Jokes!

Kid Jokes

Adult Jokes

 
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