100+ Zoo-rific Zoo Jokes [Free Joke Cards]

Last Updated on January 10, 2024 by Michele Tripple

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Laugh out loud with these fun zoo jokes that are perfect for all ages. You and the kids will be laughing in no time!

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My kids love going to the zoo! Each year we buy a zoo pass and visit it multiple times. It is the perfect way to detach from screens and spend time out in nature. Whenever we do we find ourselves telling each other zoo jokes on the way. Tony loves to tell the jokes to the animals as we watch them. The joy he has on his face as he does is priceless. Discover your favorite zoo jokes below for endless fun, and giggles with the kids.

For more zoo fun, check out our other joke collections: Farm Jokes, Cow Jokes and our Cat Jokes.

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Funny Zoo Jokes

These zoo jokes are perfect for a ton of laughs as you are at the zoo or driving to the zoo. Do you think if you told a monkey a zoo joke you could get them to laugh? Try it and see!

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  • What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato!
  • What’s a lion’s favorite state? Maine!
  • How do you organize a zoo party? You planet!
  • What is the snake’s favorite subject? Hiss-story.
  • What’s a polar bear’s favorite food? Ice-burgers!
  • Why did the hyena sit in the shade? He didn’t want to be a hot dog!
  • Why do elephants never use computers? Because they’re afraid of the mouse!
  • What did the zoologist and the herbalist name their child? Tiger Woods.
  • Why are elephants such bad dancers? Because they have two left feet.
  • What do you call a polar bear in the jungle? Lost!
  • What is a cheetah’s favorite food? Fast food.
  • On which day do lions eat the most? Chewsday.
  • What’s a kangaroo’s favorite type of music? Hip-hop
  • What’s grey with red spots? An elephant with measles.
  • What’s a monkey’s favorite Christmas song? Jungle bells!
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  • What kind of socks do pandas wear? They don’t; they have bear feet!
  • What do you call a bear with no ear? B!
  • What did the tiger say to her cub on his birthday? It’s roar birthday!
  • What game do you never want to play with an elephant? Squash!
  • What’s a lion’s favorite candy? Roarange!
  • How do spiders communicate? Through the World Wide Web.
  • What is the best way to catch a squirrel? Act like a nut.
  • What does a lion say to his pride before they go hunting? Let us prey…
  • What do you call an alligator in a vest? Investigator!
  • What’s a tiger running a copy machine called? A copycat!
  • Why are leopards bad at hide and seek? They’re always spotted!
  • What reptiles do you get when you cross a lion with a camel? A chameleon.
  • How does a lion move a boat? He uses roars
  • What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!
  • What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing? Its shadow.
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  • How do tigers describe themselves? Purr-fect!
  • Why did the lion always lose at poker? He was playing with a bunch of cheetahs.
  • What was the first animal in space? The cow that jumped over the moon.
  • What do ducks watch on TV? Duck-umentaries.
  • Where does a tiger sleep? Anywhere he wants to!
  • Why did the elephant bring a suitcase to the zoo? Because he wanted to pack his trunk!
  • Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? Because they lactose.
  • How does a dog stop a video? He presses the paws button.
  • How do you brush a lion’s teeth? Very carefully
  • What happens when you cross a wolf with a sheep? You have to get a new sheep.
  • How do monkeys get down the stairs? They slide down the banana-ster.
  • Who’s the best at maths in the zoo?The adder!
  • What do you call a lioness wearing a dress with flowers on it? A dandy lion.
  • Why did the snake cross the road? To get to the other ssssssside!
  •  What is black, white, and red all over? A sunburnt penguin.
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  • Why does a tiger make such a good partner? Because it’s not a cheetah.
  • What happened when the lion ate the comedian? He felt funny.
  • What do you get when you put a bird in the freezer? A ch-ch-chilly bird!
  • What was the wolf in the butcher’s shop arrested for? Chop-lifting.
  • What does the elephant keeper wear at the beach? Swimming trunks!
  • Where did the cat go when it lost its tail? To the retail store!
  • Why did the koala refuse to lend the panda a pencil? Because he didn’t want to give it back with a chewing problem!
  • What do you call a tiger who always gets the same scores as one other person? A tie-ger.
  • What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow? A watchdog.
  • Why did the lion spit out the clown? Because he tasted funny.
  • What is the biggest type of ant? An eleph-ant.
  • What do you call a lion with chickenpox? A dotted lion.
  • Why are tigers bad at story telling? They only have one tail!
  • What do you call a monkey in a suit? An ape-ril fool.
  • What does a frog eat with his hamburger? French flies.
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  • Which kinds of snakes are found on cars? Windshield viper?
  • How do tigers like their cheese? Grrrrreated
  • What do you give a seasick elephant? A very big bag.
  • What’s a kangaroo’s favorite drink? A juice pouch.
  • What does a zebra look like? A horse behind bars.
  • What do you get if you cross a parrot with a pigeon?  Voice mail.
  • Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Because they have big fingers!
  • What is the only difference between a lion and a tiger? The mane part is missing in a tiger.
  • Why do all ducks fly south for the winter? Because it’s too far to walk.
  • Why did the monkey go to the doctor? Because he wasn’t peeling well.
  • What happened when 100 hares escaped from the zoo? Police had to comb the area!
  • What do you call a girl with a frog on her head? Lilly.
  • What do you call an elephant that won’t share? Elfish.
  • What animal do you get when you cross a lion with a camel? A chameleon.
  • What do you call a sarcastic duck? A wise quacker.
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  • Why do tigers always hunt and eat their prey raw? Because they don’t know how to cook it.
  • On which day do tiger eat people? Chewsday 
  • What do you call a parrot when he can’t fly? A walkie talkie.
  • What did the dog say to the elephant? Woof.
  • What do you get when you cross a chicken with a cow? Roost beef!
  • Why should you never play cards in the zoo? Too many cheetahs!
  • What’s a monkey’s favorite drink? A banana smoothie.
  • What’s striped and goes round and round? A tiger in a revolving door.
  • What do you call a lion powered by a battery? A Li-on.
  • Why don’t lions like fast food? They can’t catch it!
  • Why does a momma kangaroo hate the rain? Because on those days the kids have to play inside
  • What kind of ant is even bigger than an elephant? A gi-ant!
  • What kind of music do sophisticated kangaroos listen to? Hopera.
  • What do you call a crying camel? A humpback wail!
  • Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.
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  •  What do lions wear to bed? Paw-jamas.
  •  What’s a monkey’s favorite game? Hangman.
  •  What did the train conductor say to the kangaroo? “Hop on!”
  •  What does a snake keeper have on his car? Windshield vipers!
  •  What’s a monkey’s favorite flower? Ape-tunia.
  •  What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo? A pouch potato.
  •  Why didn’t the squirrel hibernate? It was too hiber-late.
  •  What do you call a male panda? Amanda
  •  What do you need to spell Panda? All you need is, P and A.
  •  Why was the cow scared? She was a cow-herd!
  •  Why do monkeys like to swing through trees? Because it’s ape-solutely fun.
  •  Which shoes do squirrels use for walking?  Cashews.
  •  How are pandas made? You punch a polar bear in the eyes.
  •  What kind of cats like to go bowling? Alley cats.
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  • What do you call a group of pandas that make music? Bandas
  • Why did the frog wear a mask and go to the bank? To robbit.
  • What do you call a monkey in a spacesuit? An astro-chimp.
  • What do pandas say on Halloween? Bam-BOO!
  • What do you call an alligator who solves mysteries? An investgator!
  • What happened to the frog that parked in the wrong zone? His car was toad.
  • What’s the most musical part of a chicken? The drumstick!
  • What’s the difference between a fish and a piano? You can’t tuna fish!
  • What do pandas drink? Bambooze.
  • How can you tell that a frog is angry? When it is hopping mad.
  •  How do frog secret agents communicate? They use Morse Toad.
  • What do you call a gorilla who has been locked up in prison?  A kong-vict.
  • What is a squirrel’s favorite number?  Tree.
  • Where do frogs get their eggs? At the spawn shop.
  • What did the father squirrel tell his family? Acorn-y joke.
  •  What goes dot-dot-croak, dot-dash-croak? Morse toad.
  • Where do monkeys get their gossip? On the ape vine.
  • What do frogs use to fasten sheets of metal?  Ribbets.
  • What do you call a female gorilla?  A gurl-illa.
  • What is frog’s favorite soda? Croaka-cola.
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  • What type of music do posh frogs listen to? Hopera.
  • What do you call a purple gorilla?  A grape ape.
  • What do stylish frogs wear? Jumpsuits.
  • What’s a gorilla’s favorite drink?  Chimpan-tea.
  • Which frog has horns? A bullfrog

Share your favorite funny zoo jokes in the comments!

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